Pretty little lies

What do I know.
I know that because of Jesus, because a brother I didnt know I had saw me, loved me and then sacrificed himself for me so that I could come home.
I could leave the dark, desolate, alone lands and come home.
There would be no repercussions, no remembering who I was before I was home.
It would be dark… and then light.
It is impossible to go back surely.  Once adopted.. ?
Satan seems to try and hang “old” stuff on you. To draw you down a path that looks like it leads to those nether lands, but it dosent actually exist any more.  Right?  All that “before stuff” is gone, incinerated.  In the power of a love that has no darkness at all.
So what is it that we fall into…? Maybe forgetting.  We forget.
We get caught up in the mad whirl of things and forget.. but why.
Why does the mad whirl of things cause us to forget?
Maybe because the mad whirl of things is not made up of our counter culture, our surreal society.
The mad whirl of things is made up of all that we were taken out of.  All those things that keep society going without the God who made us.
So it is geared to make us forget.. it does not change who we are or remove who we are, it just makes us forget.
The forgetting means our heart is not protected, it is not guarded and we become weak and feeble as Satan drapes us with lies.
Lies that become like mud as we walk, lies that catch at our ankles and trip us up.
Lies that have no grip on the shoulders of a guarded heart.
Lies that burn up as soon as they touch the most outer extremity of our hearing, when our heart is guarded.
Lies about our past failures,
Lies about who we are,
Lies about how we look.
Lies that can appear as truth.
Lies that keep us small and in the dirt.
Lies that hold us on the milk.
Lies that keep us in old truth, afraid of the new.
Lies that prevent us becoming.
Guard your heart, Beloved of God.
Remind yourself daily, who you truly are.
Polish those words written on your heart
Dont let the dust of worry and fear settle over that which is etched there,
causing you to forget.
Guard your heart, Beloved of God.

The Slamming door

1Pe 5:6  Then be humbled under the mighty hand of God, that He may exalt you in time;
1Pe 5:7  “casting all your anxiety onto Him,” because it matters to Him concerning you.
Why have I forgotten this again?
I still dont believe I matter… that deep down I am worthless
I have to stay wrapped up in your presence
For the longer I am away
The easier it is to become cold
TO be eased outside the door
Until again I am watching from the outside in
It matters to Him concerning you….
AH, oh crud, the lie has unfolded in my heart again
wrapping its tendrils around my bare soul
Opening the path to the pit and tugging me down
But the gentle quiet voice will not be silenced
He whispers inexorably into my broken heart
With tenderness that I am unable to withstand
The lie withers in the fierceness of His love
The unfolding retreats back to the pit from where it came
I am astonished at the small longing in my bare soul for the lie
For the independance it brings,
for the self satisfaction flag it raises over the lonely house
for the pride that sweeps the floors
and the selfishness that slams the isolation shutters
I see the battle in me now, the thorn in my side
The conflict and tension that exist between the old and the new
But He walks these rooms, these floors, flinging wide the doors
My bare dusty soul is swept clean again,
Filled with light and life and grace and Love as
The shutters are flung open and the sun streams in
He is my answer to the broken world I hid from
He is the answer to my broken heart I hid from
I am humbled under His might hand again
I am up from the dust again
He is the ground of my being, again
I lift my eyes to my true Centre,
Again.